What are animals?
This question is big question and we can’t hope to answer it today. Instead, we’ll narrow our focus. Let’s start with the ten best animals (according to studies) and see if we can describe them:
Chickens: pecky egg-makers
Elephants: boulders with a weird nose
Dogs: companions that lick your face
Cows: stomach hoarding slow-pokes
Whales: giant bags of blubber
Horses: old timey bicycles
Pigs: snouted pillows
Monkeys: people with hairy clothes
Sharks: pointy underwater robots
Snakes: dangerous belts
These results will now be extrapolated to cover the rest of the animal kingdom.
Below is a cartoon I made for Wired Magazine, in 2019.
Signed prints available here.